Life

I listened to my pastor's sermon from this past week, his first after an annual 7 week sabbatical. (Matt and I were at Friendship church this past week to listen to my Father preach. They are in town for their ministry.) Pastor pretty much preached the mural we created in Mexico- John 10.

Abundant Life. It is real. And I think I forget that I can have it- life abundantly. I already have so much more joy and peace than the masses around me, I am sure of that. From the doses I receive in God's word and prayer. Secret smiles he gives me through out the day that only I would recognize (Im convinced). And yet, I think there is more. I believe he desires even more joy, even more peace, even more fruit, if I would continue to open myself to the work of Spirit.

I want it. I was thinking earlier today how much do I really believe there is heaven. I do believe, and yet, I have a little anxiety around dying. And not for Christian reasons, like "I cant go yet, there are others who need saving..." As much as I do believe that, that there are others who need love and joy and peace like I am experiencing, AND MORE... but I still, in my finiteness, think I would miss this place alittle. Did I say that out loud? Maybe there is a way to love this world, but not be of it, to look forward to the country to come, but still livei n the moment here, and do it all abundantly, with overflowing joy, and love and peace.

At my last interview, the woman across the table told me "You are just so peaceful, this is the most peaceful interview I have ever had" There was one of those smile he gives me. I hope she remembers that feeling for years to come and one day it draws her to Christ. If only it would have drawn her to give me the job... lol. God is good.